Haven't been here in a while. Things haven't changed. A couple more conversations but nothing has changed. I felt a little bit better getting it out on occasion but nothing has changed. I work so hard. I am stubborn. Why would anyone want to be with someone who doesn't care about them? At least like a husband. It doesn't make sense. Yes, I should suck it up and make a move. Like to another place. But it's the house. And the child who has lived so many years in it. I am miserable. Depressed. Unliking most things in my life right now. Feeling worthless at my job. Argh. Yup. Nothing a good run won't fix. Ha!